Yesterday I wrote a marriage proposal.

For work.

MOST AWKWARD LETTER. EVER.

Some guy came to our office and asked us to write a marriage proposal letter to a woman he wanted to propose to. The letter was to contain a number of conditions he’d meet if she agreed to marry him, including agreeing to sign a pre-nuputial and arranging for her parents to visit them. The letter also had to ask her to “forget about their past”. The solicitor in charge didn’t want to write the letter, so he got me to draft the whole thing. Obviously I had to make it sound as professional as standard legal correspondences but goddamn, it was difficult balancing the cold, formal language while trying to sneak a little sincerity in “on behalf of our client”.

Apparently the woman had already rejected the guy’s marriage proposal before when she found out that the only property he owned was owned jointly between himself and his sister (in the event of a divorce between the dude and the woman, it would mean the woman would have a hard time getting a piece of that property because a third party owns half of it). So he’s trying again after also agreeing to transfer the property directly into his own name, along with a number of sweet deals in the pre-nup. Why he thought the best way to propose again is to pay hundreds of dollars to a solicitor to write the proposal for him, that’s anyone’s guess.

Even if they did get married, I wonder how long it would last if she’s so preoccupied with what she could get from him if they divorced. =/